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Topic: How and When Do I Tell ??? ( worried)
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 sincere500
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Sabriyyah Edith A. G.
(Meriden)
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Member
Posts: 1
Joined: May 2007
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Bismillahi-rahmaani-raheem. Allahumma sali 'ala Muhammad wa 'ala aali Muhammad wa sabihi wa salaam. May Allah forgive us for our shortcommings and answer our duaa. Ameen.
Before a sister became muslim she was like any average highschool girl and dated, ignorantly. Doing so she flawed her health. Her health problem is not life threatening though, but it is communicable through relations, intimacy. In her previous marriage (not married now) her husband did not become infected with the virus over a period of three years. While she considers marriage she would like to be wholeheartedly honest and proclaim her health status for those who show interest and she cannot decide when it is the right time and how to phrase her words knowing that society does not accept sick people with open arms though in reality many of us were a bit unfortunate, Allahu alim, maybe it is an alleviation from sins al-hamdulillah but people wouldnt see it that way. Right now, she thinks that it should be among the first things said on her part. She was advised not to say anything because it happened before islam which she thinks is so wrong. She thinks to inform the person right away because she feels why allow him to maybe become so interested to where hes almost sure he wants to marry her and then drop this big news on him ya' know so what do you think. According to the quran and sunnah what is anyones advice (who is knowledgeable in this) on what the mannerism should be in this situation? I thank you for your attention and time jazakallah khairun.
May Allah allow us to mend our problems with our families and support one another in our stuggles and hardship. Ameen
Wa salaamu alaikum wa rahmaatullahi wa barrakatu!
This message was edited by sincere500 on 6-5-07 @ 2:41 AM
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| umm.aishah.hasna
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Umm A'ishah Hasna N Bint F. O'Neil
(USA)
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Member
Posts: 17
Joined: Jul 2004
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As salaamu alaikii,
I got this info from one of my groups:
Taken from the book called "A Concise Manual of Marriage"
from al-Allaamah, ash-Shaykh Muahmmad Ibnu-Saalih al-'Uthaymeen
on pg.82-83
[Q12]: I want to marry someone who has herpes and his deen and character is very good. What do you suggest I do?
[A12]: The rulings of Islaamic law addresses everyone; sick and healthy in a similar way.
With regard to the one who is sick, Al-Imaam Muslim collected a hadeeth from Aboo Hurayrah that the Messenger of Allaah (Peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "The owner of sick camels should not bring them to the healthy ones."
Concerning the one who is healthy, the Prophet said: "Run away from the leper as you would run away from a lion." Collected by Al-Imaam Ahmad and it was graded as saheeh by Al-Imaam Muhammad Naasirud-Deen Al-Albaanee.
Leprosy is a well-known contagious disease - we ask Allaah to keep us safe and sound.
On the authority of 'Amr Ibn Ash-Shareed that his father said: Among the delegation from Thaqeef there was a leper. The Prophet sent word to him saying:
"We have accepted your oath of allegiance; go back."
In the important book by Shaykhul-Islaam Ibnul-Qayyim Al-Jawziyyah entitled
'Miftaah Daarus-Sa'aadah' (2/272):
"He sent word to that leper accepting his oath of allegiance so as to establish the shar'i principal of staying away from harmful and hateful things, because a person should not expose himself to the causes of harm"
" The superiority of the scholar over the worshipper is like the superiority of the night of the full moon over the rest of the heavenly bodies. And, the scholars are the heirs of the prophets. The prophets do not endow gold coins, nor silver coins. They
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| zaahir.abd
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Zaahir bin Hernandez
(Newark,N.J.(Amreekaa))
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Member
Posts: 187
Joined: Nov 2002
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As salaamu 'alaikum
Sister you should take this to the Scholars. Perhaps you know someone in your community that can call one of the Scholars and have him ask.
السلام عليكم ورحمةالله
ابوعبدالرحمن زاهر
سبحانك اللهم وبحمدك
أشهد أن لا إله إلا أنت
أستغفرك وأتوب إليك
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04-06-2007 @ 4:38 AM
27-07-2007 @ 12:07 PM
31-07-2007 @ 7:22 PM